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Hoosier Musings on the Road to Emmaus

Saturday, April 05, 2008

How to recognize a Hoosier

You Know You're From Indiana When...


  • On game night, the high school baskeball gym is the most populous “city” in the county.
  • The local paper covers national and international headlines on 1 page but requires 6 for sports.
  • You can see at least 2 basketball hoops from your yard.
  • You understood the details of the CART vs. IRL debate, and took sides.
  • You rode the school bus for an hour each way.
  • People at your high school chewed tobacco.
  • “Getting caught by a train” is a legitimate excuse for being late to school.
  • The biggest decision of your youth was "Purdue or IU?”
  • The second biggest decision was “Ford or Chevy?”
  • You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better."
  • Kids and dogs ride in the passenger seats of cars and the backs of pickups.
  • You “take back roads to get there.” Why sit in traffic?
  • You think nothing of it in spring and fall to be stuck behind a farm implement driving on the roads.
  • You carry jumper cables in your car.
  • Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
  • To get to school you had to drive on a gravel road, a road with several right-angle turns in it or if you were really lucky, over a covered bridge.
  • You know several people who have hit a deer.
  • You've seen all the biggest bands-- ten years after they were popular.
  • All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, or grain.
  • When asked how your trip was to any foreign, exotic place, you say, "It was different."
  • You consider being called a "Pork Queen" an honor.
  • You see people wear bib overalls at funerals.
  • You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
  • You know what "cow tipping" is.
  • You’ve heard of Euchre, you know how to play Euchre, and you are the master of Euchre.
  • Your school classes were canceled because of cold.
  • Your school classes were canceled because of heat.
  • You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
  • You know what's knee-high by the Fourth of July.
  • Stores don't have bags, they have sacks.
  • You drink "pop."
  • You end your sentences with an unnecessary preposition. Example: “Where’s my coat at?”‘ or “If you go to the mall, I wanna go with.”
  • You say things like “catty-wumpus” and “kitty-corner.”
  • Your teens refer to the bus as the 'cheese wagon', and refuse to ride it.
  • De-tassling was your first job. Bailing hay was your second.
  • You know that bailin’ wire was the predecessor to duct tape.
  • You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
  • You know that a “tenderloin” is not an expensive cut of beef, but a big, salty, breaded piece of pork served on a bun with lettuce, tomato, pickles, and mayonnaise.


OpenID dawgdays said...

And you know that Michigan City and Chicago Heights are not in Michigan and Illinois.

April 05, 2008 1:34 PM  

Blogger Reverend Ref + said...

No wonder you fit in so well here in Montana.

April 05, 2008 3:24 PM  

Blogger cheesehead said...

Damn, this makes me homesick!

I had a classmate who was the "Indiana Shorthorn Lassie", and another whose father was the president of the Indiana Pork Producers.

And...let me say for the record: French Lick is not as sexy as it sounds.

April 05, 2008 6:23 PM  

Blogger Jane Ellen+ said...

Dawgdays: Michigan City is in Indiana (where I did field ed, as well as my curacy!); but Chicago Heights really is in Illinois. It's East Chicago that's on our side of the state line.

Cheese: One of my first college friends was the Howard County Pork Queen that year, while another was a breed rep (though I don't remember which breed). Coming out of "The Region" as I did, I was fascinated.

April 05, 2008 9:39 PM  

OpenID dawgdays said...

I knew Chicago Heights didn't sound right. Dang.

April 06, 2008 12:03 AM  

Blogger Sue said...

Hey, we drink "pop" up here in Canada too! What is this "soda" people talk about anyway?

April 07, 2008 8:52 AM  

Blogger SpiritMists said...

You know what's funny? The Heater/AC in the same day applies to Louisiana natives too! But I had no idea what a Queen Porker is....until now!

April 09, 2008 11:32 PM  

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